the waiting game

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So, it’s Thursday April 3, 2014.

The day before our due date.

I have officially been on maternity leave for the past two days and have been waiting for our little girl to make her grand entrance into this world since Tuesday. I never knew waiting could be so hard and so frustrating at times. We are literally out of baby preparedness things to do and it’s starting to become difficult to think of things I can do around here to keep myself occupied and productive. I am a person that has a really hard time sitting, relaxing, and being patient. Even when I take a vacation I always find myself taking the first couple of days before my brain will let me actually relax.

It’s so funny because I feel like I have been waiting and waiting for certain milestones, these big check point dates to come and go and show our progress through this whole pregnancy journey.

-I remember counting down the days until we could finally announce our pregnancy to friends and family. Making it to 12 weeks seemed like such a long wait and the two days that we finally started telling people was such a relief.

-Then there was the countdown to the second trimester. Waiting for the magical date that would signal brighter, less nauseated days ahead and hopefully a little bump to prove I was actually pregnant.

-On to the countdown to finding out the gender. Proving that my husband was and has always been right that our first baby would be a little girl.

-And then there was the count down to spring break, when I decided I would use the break to finish preparing our nursery and getting things ready in case she decided to make an early arrival.

-Then I counted down the days to my maternity leave and hoping and praying that I would make it to March 31st so that I could have everything in my classroom ready for my sub and my students prepared for my impending leave.

-And here we are… counting down the days to when this little one may or may not decide on her own to show up. This is the hardest wait of all.

But this is just another example of one of the many instances God has made me wait on His timing. Who knew that someone so small could teach someone such big things? It’s crazy to think how much I have learned from this girl in these past 9 months and how much more there is to learn. It’s crazy to think that we have made it through so many milestones and yet there are so many ahead and how more often than I would like to admit – I wasn’t ever sure we would make it all the way to the end. At times I feel like I just can’t wait to meet her, but if it means waiting for the best and most beautiful person I have ever met…I can wait, but at least I know my heart is ready.

*photo by Kate Love Photography

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